A Collection of Workout Horror Stories to Keep Your Heart Racing

Hi folks! This year I decided to get into a shape other than round….little did I know what kind of adventures I would have.

“Hey Nature, Is That A Wind Storm Or Are You Just Happy To See Me?” and other horror stories from the workout front lines…

Hey, could you keep it down?

Each morning as part of my workout I go out and walk. Now I tend to have bad luck when it comes to things like coordination and rhythm, so I use music to help me stay focused and to pass the time faster. I also like to sing along…loudly.

At 4:30am I get ready and head out for my walk. I put my swimbuds headphones in, turn on my Underwater Audio waterproof iPod and start down the street. What starts as humming along to my music quickly escalates into a full-blown rendition of  “Best of You” by the Foo Fighters.

 

Before I know it, I’ve walked farther than I was planning to!

Awesome.

I turn around and start to head back to my house when I notice a lot more lights on in the neighborhood than usual. Odd, but not alarming…so I keep walking.

Then I hear someone walking up behind me and I move to the side because it sounds like they are coming in fast. I am expecting to see an athletic, 80-something man (or woman) in a fluorescent jogging suit power-walk by me and leave me in the dust.

Then I feel a hand grab my shoulder.

I would like to say that I used a ninja move, flipped, and disabled my attacker. I really would like to tell you that, but in the name of truth I have to say that I screamed like a girl, jumped, and spun around.

The man who had been following me just smiled politely and asked if I could please not sing next time I went walking in the morning. Apparently I had scared his kids. I felt my face turn bright red, quickly said “Okay, sorry!” and tried to play it cool.

I walked the rest of the way home, humming softly.

 

When did weights get heavy?

Along with walking, I have added some weight lifting to my daily routine. I was in for a big surprise.
In my younger days I used to lift all the time. I recovered quickly and it was no big deal to lift every muscle group, every day.
Now at 30, I thought, “I’m still young, what’s the harm?” so I started lifting right where I had left off!
 
The first day went great. I was lifting everything in sight and didn’t feel strained. I came home and went about my day and had all but forgotten about my workout at bedtime. Then the morning came.

When I first woke up I didn’t try to move. I opened my eyes, smiled, and thought about how fantastic yesterday had been.

After hitting snooze for the second time, it was go-time. I rolled out of bed in my usual fashion, but instead of landing on my feet, I landed flat on my face.

HELP! I’M ON FIRE! No wait….that’s just the feeling of every muscle in my body telling me they hate me. After working so hard the day before, I guess all of my appendages decided to take the day off and refused to work at all.

I finally made it downstairs, out the door, and all the way to work. But I couldn’t sit down or even lift my arms. If a five year old tried to fight me, I would probably lose.

Yes, it was THAT bad.

It was at this moment that I learned a valuable lesson.

When returning to weight lifting after 10 years, go very slow or you will feel (and feel…and feel…) the burn.

Hey nature, is that a wind storm or are you just happy to see me?

When I made the commitment to work out, it was for better or for worse, richer or poorer, in sickness or in health, etc.
Well last week it was for worse.
All night long the wind had been picking up and blowing the rain so hard it was drumming on the windows. My alarm went off at 4:30 as usual. Sure enough, I got up and went out to brave the storm.
At first it wasn’t so bad…just a little drizzle and some refreshing wind.
About a mile into my walk, nature slapped me in the face with a giant, windy hand.
All I could hear was wind howling and whistling as I plodded on down the street.
This was all fine until I lost my umbrella. That was the last straw.
I looked up and yelled, “Fine, I give!” So I turned around and headed home, soaked, tired, and umbrella-less.
The next morning, I found my umbrella folded around a bush.
Thanks, wind.
 

Horror Stories continued….

These are just a few of the workout horror stories from my weight loss experience so far. Please share any of your crazy stories and experiences below in the comment section!


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